I'm in Asia!

Asia is very different from North America, and I'm certain that even that is an understatement. There are many levels of these differences, and having been here only two weeks, I am only able to describe some of the surface level differences.

Traffic

In America, we have many traffic regulations, signs, and stoplights. Most people abide by these regulations, and the consequences are serious if you do not. If there is a lot of traffic, it moves much slower. We must wear seat belts, and stay in our lanes. cutting people off can be very offensive, and start screaming matches. There is a lot of "road rage" because people take things personally when they are driving. Honking generally means you are angry.

In Southeast Asia, traffic works differently. There are lanes and a few traffic lights, but they are more of suggestions. Even when there are large amounts of traffic, it can flow pretty quickly. People in the back seats especially don't have to wear seat belts. People weave in and out quite frequently, and cutting others off is just how you make sure you get where you need to go. Honking is common, and lets others know you are there, and are not stopping for them, but most times it is not a result of anger.

Time

In the States, my life can get pretty hectic. I find myself going from one thing to the next, rushing to make it on time. I worry about being late, because I might miss part of the event, or upset someone.

Here, time is so much more relaxed. If something is supposed to start on the hour, it may start 20 or 30 minutes after the hour, and no one is upset. The other day I had a funny clash with this aspect of the culture. During my break for lunch, a friend took me to run an errand. My next session was scheduled for 130 and my friend assured me we'd be back in time. We got a taxi there, but on the way back, had to hop in a "pedicab" (like a trike, but instead of a motorcycle, it is powered by peddling a bicycle). It was traveling quite slow, and the two of us realized we would not make it back in time. The only thing we could do was laugh and joke about slowing it down because we're too heavy! So I'm learning that I just need to let go enjoy the culture.

Food

I could talk forever about this. I love the food here. It is very different, but most everything I've had is delicious. One of the first things I learned about meals here is that it is not one unless there is rice. Also, they eat with a spoon in their right hand and a fork in their left. The fork is used to push food onto the spoon. Knives are not needed, because everything is prepared in small pieces or is easy enough to pull apart.

I could say much more on this subject, but I'm sure I'll have more stories to tell in the future.

I was going to also put up a video of me eating my first balut, or at least some pictures, but unfortunately they will not currently upload. Hopefully I can get them up soon!

Until next time,

One Thing I Do:

Last week I took a personal retreat day.

It had been a long time coming. With everything winding down in time for me to leave on Jan 9th, I was still so caught up in trying to say goodbyes, that my heart and mind were not really prepared for what lies ahead. I needed some time just to spend with God.

That day, many thoughts filled the pages of my journal and many songs filled my heart, but one passage of scripture stood out to me. It was Philippians 3: 7-14. The apostle Paul here wrote about counting everything as loss for the sake of knowing Christ Jesus. He describes what it is like to press on toward the goal of the upward call of God, and it is this: "one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind, and straining forward to what lies ahead"

So I too must forget what lies behind. Not that I am forgetting about everyone at home so that they no longer matter to me, but that I do not any longer grasp onto them. I must let go of everything that could potentially hold me back or hinder me from the work I go to do.

So that is my prayer, and I beg of you to pray the same thing for me; that I would be able to do this one thing: let go of what lies behind and strain forward to what lies ahead.
I will by no means abandon those I leave behind. I mean to keep in contact. But my focus is on the work the Lord gives, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and share in His sufferings.

A Prayer for Bringing Our Fears to Jesus

This prayer by Scotty Smith is vvery appropriate for the things I have been pondering recently. Tomorrow night, I will go before the students at my church and share my story. I will tell them about my experiences with dating, my fear of man, and how God brought me to the place I am today. As I read over old journal writings of mine and Bible studies that highlight times of my enlightenment during the past few years, my mind is on these things. How much more timely can you be, Scotty Smith??

A Prayer for Bringing Our Fears to Jesus

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” Luke 2:8-12

Gracious Lord Jesus, you confront us with the liberating command, “Do not be afraid”, at both your birth and your resurrection (Luke 2:10; Matt. 28:5). Like bookends of glory… the A to Z of grace… a morning and evening kiss. There is no savior as merciful and mighty as you.Ever since our first parents sinned, feared, and then hid, I’ve helped to keep the family tradition alive. At times fear has more power over my life than your love. Though I know I’m already clothed in your righteousness, I still reach into the closet for fresh fig leaves. So I join the shepherds today in coming to you, for you alone bring the good news of great joy for which my heart longs every day. You alone can charm my fears and grant me an ever greater freedom. Because the gospel is true, I can tell you everything that’s going on inside of me. As I come to you, you run to me. I am so thankful for your pursuing and welcoming heart.Lord Jesus, my fears aren’t all that noble. I’m not really afraid of angelic hosts. I’m not really afraid to die. I’m not even afraid of facing the final judgment, for I humbly cling to your cross as my Judgment Day. You have exhausted God’s judgment against all my sins—past, present, and future. Hallelujah… many times over!So what fears haunt me? For what fears do I need to obey the command “Do not be afraid”? I’ll start with the fear of man. Jesus, there are some people whose praise or disdain has more functional power over my heart than the gospel does. It hurts to say that, but it’s true. By the power of the gospel, continue to slay the “approval suck” inside of me. I also have moments when I fear painful things happening to members of my family. But I know, in my heart of hearts, that you love and care for my family much more than I do. They belong to you by creation and redemption. Grant me grace to trust you more.Then there’s the fear of disappearing into a fog bank of not mattering anymore—of getting older, being out of touch, becoming irrelevant. Jesus, even as I acknowledge this fear, I praise you for your non-condemning gaze. It’s not easy to confess such weakness. May the joy of being used by you never supersede the much greater joy of simply being known by you and loved by you.Jesus, I have other fears in line for gospel charming, and I bring them to you today with joy and confidence. For you’re no longer a baby wrapped in cloths lying in a manger; you’re a Savior outside an empty tomb, exalted to the right hand of the Father, ever living to advocate and pray for me, preparing a place and a banquet for me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. So very Amen I pray in your welcoming and liberating name.

Tears of This Saint

Two days ago, I saw God's fingerprints everywhere. He was like a sloppy Santa Claus who forgot to wear gloves, and left evidence of his presence (and presents?) everywhere he went.

Two days ago I was reminded of the importance of carving out time just to be with people I love and to have conversations that mean something. I was reminded what it's like to cry with them. I know that sounds odd, but crying is something I do pretty often, just because I am a person who feels a lot. I generally cry in movies that are touching or sad. I typically cry when my friends are hurting or really joyful. I typically cry when God moves in an awesome way; when I'm reminded of how incredible His love is for me; when I am having a rough week;when I am drained and wearied; when I feel lonely. All of these things could typically make me cry.

Yet this past month or so, almost all of those things had occurred but still I had not been able to cry.

At first I attributed it to the fact that I was really excited about certain things happening in my life right now, and thought I was, in a sense, "on an emotional high." But then it began to bother me. I felt really low for a couple days but felt as though I could not properly or fully process or deal with what was going on. I thought maybe if I cried, I would be able to feel the emotions more strongly and identify what was going on. So I began to pray that God would allow me to cry.

Nope.

This whole thing had been going on for over a month and I thought, as a girl, that doesn't seem right. my cycle usually makes it easier for me to cry(pardon my frankness)--but not even that did anything this time. Not until I sat in the car with my best friend sharing her heart with me did my eyes even well up. It was then that I saw her frustration and sadness, and I began to break for her. tears came out of my eyes that very minute, trickling down.

I still don't understand fully why God withheld those tears from me for so long. But I know now more than before how beneficial my tears are to processing my emotions. Thank you Lord, for tears. May we never be ashamed to display our emotion, whether sadness or great joy.